Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Ask Brett Favre


As Brett Favre ponders whether he should make another return with the Minnesota Vikings, The RamBox knows it is not the only thing on his mind. Favre has been running an advice column for his local Mississippi newspaper ever since the season ended for the Jets. Lets take a look at some of his advice.

Dear Brett,

I am having trouble with my college decisions. Both NYU and Harvard have offered me full scholarships but i can't decide which one to go to. What should I do Brett?

From,

Alex

Dear Alex,

Well, both of those are good schools. Thats a tough decision. But if i were in your shoes, i would go with NYU. You cant't beat th education and the city life. Its great. But then again harvard is really ncie. you could really make a name for yourself. you should go to harvard. but don't pass up NYU. go to NYU. You would be stupid not to. But then again Harvard is really nice. Are there any colleges that turned you down? You should go to their division rival just to spite them. Yale? Thats probably your best move. Yeah, go there.

From,

Brett #4

Minnesota Vikings Starting QB

Dear Brett,

I'm a good ol' Mississippi boy like you. Recently, my girlfriend of 2 years and I have been on the rocks. We fight all the time. The other day I was taking my cousin out to the Dairy Queen for a Frozen Blizzard when I had sex with her while wearing my Wrangler Jeans. (I know you can appreciate the sensati0n only Wrangler can provide). I don't know what to do. Which should I choose?

Sincerely,
Confused in Mississippi

Dear Confused in Mississippi,

Keep fucking your cousin. Ignore what the analysts say and what former Whale Like former coaches say. Make sure your current girlfriend never finds out. Did you know I nearly left Green Bay 4 times? True story. Once in 96 to go to Philadelphia, and again in 2000 to Carolina. Green Bay never caught on. The point is this. Stay with your girlfriend and fuck your cousin. Everyone wins. When you're too old to do fuck right, drop both of them for a place with a better starting Running Back.

From,

Brett Favre #4
Minnesota Vikings Starting QB

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